Last amended: May 5, 2025

By accessing this website (hereafter, “the Site”), you are entering into a legally binding contract—yes, a contract, not a casual suggestion. These Terms of Service (the “Agreement”) govern your use of this Site.

If you cannot or will not accept these terms in full, your remedy is simple—close the tab and retreat. Continued use of the Site signifies your informed consent to every clause, condition, and caveat that follows.

I. Intellectual Property (Or: Don’t Steal Our Work)

Every original element on this Site—its content, design, code, and charming grammatical choices—is our intellectual property. That includes copyrights, trademarks, trade secrets, and any other legal protections known to civil society and international treaty. You are granted a limited, revocable license to view and use the Site for personal, non-commercial purposes only.

Copy, modify, distribute, reverse engineer, or otherwise tamper with the materials, and you will find yourself on the receiving end of enforcement measures that no amount of “but I found it on Google” will excuse.

II. Termination (We Can Pull the Plug)

We reserve the unilateral right—yes, unilateral—to terminate your access to the Site at any time, for any reason, or for no reason at all. We are not required to issue warnings, notifications, or perform interpretive dances explaining our rationale.

Upon termination, all rights granted to you shall cease immediately. You agree that we bear no liability to you or any third party for the deletion or loss of any data associated with your use of the Site. Sections regarding ownership, disclaimers, limitation of liability, and indemnification will survive, as any competent drafter would ensure.

III. External Links (The Wild West of the Internet)

This Site may contain links to third-party websites. Let me be blunt: we neither own nor control those domains, and we accept no responsibility for what lurks behind those hyperlinks. Once you depart this Site, you’re governed by their rules—not ours.

We strongly recommend you read the terms and policies of any third-party website you visit. If something goes awry there, don’t come crying to us.

IV. Disclaimers & Limitations (Of Course We Have These)

Let me be perfectly clear: this Site is provided on an “as-is” and “as-available” basis. We disclaim all warranties—express, implied, statutory, and otherwise—including but not limited to merchantability, fitness for a particular purpose, and non-infringement. If you expected perfection, you’ve confused us with a unicorn.

Under no circumstances shall we be liable for any direct, indirect, incidental, consequential, or punitive damages arising from your use—or inability to use—the Site. This limitation applies even if we were advised, warned, or screamed at in all caps about the possibility of such damages.

V. Governing Law (Geography Matters)

This Agreement shall be governed by the laws of Prince Edward Island, Canada, without regard to any choice or conflict of law principles. If a dispute arises—and history suggests someone will eventually test this—it shall be resolved exclusively in the provincial or federal courts located in PEI.

By using the Site, you irrevocably consent to the jurisdiction and venue of those courts.

VI. Modifications (The Living Document Doctrine)

We reserve the right to modify, amend, revise, or reword these Terms at any time and entirely at our discretion. When we do so, the revised version will be posted right here. That is your notice. We are not going to email you, call your grandmother, or notify you via interpretive TikTok.

Your continued use of the Site after any such changes constitutes your full and binding acceptance of the updated terms. If you object to any change, your only remedy is to stop using the Site—which, again, you are free to do.

VII. Final Remarks (In Case You Skipped Everything Above)

These Terms represent the entire agreement between you and us regarding your use of the Site. No waiver of any provision shall be deemed a further or continuing waiver, and any failure to enforce a right shall not constitute forfeiture of that right.

If any part of this Agreement is deemed unenforceable by a court of competent jurisdiction, the remaining provisions shall continue in full force and effect—because that’s how contracts work.

In Sum: Behave responsibly. Respect intellectual property. Accept the terms or leave the premises. And for heaven’s sake, read and enjoy legal documents like this.